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Marriage planning a minefield?

Can we get through this...

Planning to get married can be a minefield – treading on toes and hidden agendas. The moment you announce your engagement, wedding expectations start leaking into everyday conversation.

Family expectations OMG...

Too many ‘rellies on the guest list and not enough friends.

Mum wants to take over...

Dad's worried about costs...

Grandparents want to see you married in a church just like they were...

The in-laws turn outlaws because one of you has kids...

And the kids are soooo excited they're driving you dilly.

Whoa back up the truck. You could escape the war zone and elope – OR – together you could set the scene as you want it. Agree on what’s really important, what’s non-negotiable, what’s up for sharing. Only the two of you can set the parameters.

So here’s the thing… plan and assign tasks.
Try to give your nearest and dearest special tasks, let them be involved somehow. Maybe put your mother in charge of the flowers, your Dad on transport. Maybe your kids can write the place names and be in charge of kids activities on the day. Think outside the square.

What's important is that you secure the BIG things early on... date and time, venue, celebrant, photographer, MC, attendants - best man and lady, groomsmen, bridesmaids, hair and makeup, DJ, flowers, accommodation for guests. The rest will follow.


Allow for some surprises. Surprise each other on your BIG day. So just put your thinking caps on. Inspiration will come if you’re in the zone.

A small piece of advice...
Taking on the complete planning of your wedding can suck the lifeforce out of you. Delegate jobs where you can OR get help from a wedding planner. It's important you arrive at your wedding day in one piece, with excitement and enthusiasm - not over-worked, stressed to the max and 'over it'.

As an experienced wedding celebrant I encourage a couple to find ways to include or acknowledge their children and parents in their marriage ceremony. And welcoming your grandparents by name will make them feel remembered and loved. A wedding is love both ways.

Enjoy your wedding day. Let yourself wake up with a clear head, reasonable sleep under your belt. Smell the roses, listen to the birds, breathe the air and nourish yourself. AND TRY TO RELAX and let all those around you do their job. Savour the love and support.

Have a corker wedding – may it be full of love, laughter, and magical memories.

Jo x

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